Balling on a budget... (Updated)

"zipfuel" (zipfuel) 06/21/2020 at 12:07 • Filed to: Porsche, hot tub, TRAILERLOPNIK, Unsafe At Any Speed

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First thing I thought when I saw the thumbnail was: those look like Porsche tail lights! But surely not, it’s gotta be Pontiac Sunbird or a K car or similar domestic 80s shittiness... I was wrong

My first thought was 928 but then I opened the tweet and based on the hatch and wheel arches (rusty) that’s a 944 right? With newer wheels swapped on.

I’ll bet the Porsche Club of America are so proud (see sticker on the window)

I probably shouldn’t judge, I’m contemplating doing something similarly ridiculous looking (although a lot safer and more legal) to move a trampoline without dismantling it shortly.

Edit: found another view

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 10:20

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Schradenfrude?

GLiddy > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 10:22

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That guy deserves a medal!  I thought I was an outlaw the time I bought an old 10 foot satellite dish from a guy and took it home in the back of my 6-foot bed S10.  That thing was hanging out all over the sides of the truck, but I managed to get it home.

404 - User No Longer Available > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 10:25

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That’s a 968. Red Green really upped his budget.

The Ghost of Oppo > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 10:56

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This is straight out of an episode of The Red Green Show. I love that it’s made completely from scrap wood and logs. I wonder if there was a way for it to pivot when the car turns.

Just Jeepin' > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 11:08

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Worst I’ve ever done is hold down a wheelbarrow tub as it sat atop my del Sol (roof off).

Ok, yeah, more that I think about it the more stupid that was .

facw > The Ghost of Oppo 06/21/2020 at 11:09

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made completely from scrap wood and logs 

Did you miss the hand truck? It’s clearly the key component!

Kiltedpadre > GLiddy 06/21/2020 at 11:23

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I played the lookout role for a buddy when he moved a shed. We loaded a 10ft shed onto a utility trailer, and I drove ahead of him with walkie talkies to let him know if there was traffic that he needed to pull off the road to let pass or cops he needed to avoid.

The best was he worked for a company that did CPR training and had a bunch of old baby CPR training dummies. He just piled them in the bed of a truck and I drove behind him so I could let him know if he was dropping baby arms or heads all over the road so he could stop before we caused a panic.

ranwhenparked > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 11:56

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What’s holding it on laterally? I guess he’s got ropes stretched up and over, but doesn’t look like thing preventing it from sliding out sideways.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 12:32

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It’s a 968

Brighammer > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 12:32

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Hand truck as trailer... That’s something!

415s30 W123TSXWaggoIIIIIIo ( •_•))°) > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 12:35

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RPMs on those dolly wheels are gonna be high...

facw > ranwhenparked 06/21/2020 at 12:41

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Luck?

Only Vespas... > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 12:43

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Nice one! Go Canada! C all- it- a- day fabrication, Check. Handtruck with solid tires, Check, move this impressive pile at 1330 on a sunny day. Why not ! Whenever I  do some dubious action I always reserve 0130 as my start time. Like, darkness? So many extra points for the Porsche and it’s window tow hitch. ....I’ll bet if we check the longitude Woodstock aligns perfectly with Orlando.

boredalways > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 12:56

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How dare this man damage a 968!!!

*unless it's an automatic 

shop-teacher > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 12:58

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Ballsy. Stupid, but ballsy.

zipfuel > boredalways 06/21/2020 at 14:29

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I do hear automatics are better for towing...

Wikipedia tells me there were only 2,417 hardtops sold in the US and Canada this is a pretty rare bird - owned by a redneck

zipfuel > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 06/21/2020 at 14:32

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Nuts I always forget the 968...

zipfuel > 404 - User No Longer Available 06/21/2020 at 14:52

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I’ll bet the windows still go up and down on a power drill though

boredalways > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 14:57

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A rare bird worth more than he knows

404 - User No Longer Available > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 15:00

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*H and mixer

Dusty Ventures > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 16:19

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A friend pointed out a couple weeks ago that the tires on his hand truck said “not for highway use” on them. He thought it was ridiculous and unnecessary. I sent him this story as soon as I saw it

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 16:59

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I liked the 968 because of it has the largest 4 cy engine on a modern car at 3.0 liters.

zipfuel > Dusty Ventures 06/21/2020 at 17:08

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Behind every warning notice there is a story and usually a lawsuit...

The Compromiser > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 19:13

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Thats 35-40 minutes from my house. We’ve been shaking our heads since it happened...

Only in Woodpile, my dad would’ve said.

zipfuel > The Compromiser 06/21/2020 at 19:43

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I wanna know what happened to the hot tub, presumably he was not allowed to proceed...

Should check Kijiji/marketplace for “as is, where is....by side of road”

The Compromiser > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 21:01

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He was charged and not allowed to proceed. I'm guessing a UHaul became involved. Next time I'm that way I will check for abandoned hot tubs...

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > zipfuel 06/21/2020 at 21:49

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It’s okay, everyone seems to forget the 968 for some reason...

zipfuel > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 06/21/2020 at 22:12

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The worst part is I swear I just read an article around here about how everyone forgets the 968!

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 06/22/2020 at 09:56

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And from first-hand experience, it sounds like a big 4, with a nice growl, but with the balance shafts it’s silky smooth, like an I6. The sound doesn’t match the feel and can throw off your senses a little, especially if your other car is a BMW with an I6. The engine in my current car, a Mazda5, is similar in that it sounds rougher than it feels, and for the same reason. There is the difference of half a liter and nearly 80HP, but other than that they are remarkably similar :P

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 06/22/2020 at 11:53

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I would love to drive a 968. It’s like the ultimate iteration of the platform. I guess a 944 turbo S may be more fun but I just like the look of the 968.

Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 06/22/2020 at 14:21

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It’s funny - I’ve never driven a 944. The 968 was wonderful, and I loved the torque from that big motor. My biggest problem was other people. People constantly wanting to race on the streets and somehow ‘prove’ themselves and their car somehow superior to me and mine. I never took the bait, especially knowing that cops would probably come down harder on me than if I was driving something more modest. That all got old real fast. The best drives were when there weren’t any others around, especially in the twisties throughout the various canyons around SoCal.

Would I like to have another one? Yeah, but I’d almost rather have  more of a sleeper, something that wouldn’t attract any attention but could handle just as well. But now the 968 is probably considered a classic and slow by comparison to a cheap Tesla or V6 Accord or Camry and wouldn't have to worry about the same issues I had 20 years ago.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Full of the sound of the Gran Fury, signifying nothing. 06/22/2020 at 14:30

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I took my bone stock Datsun 240Z out and flogged it hard on Saturday. I would never get that level of enjoyment out of a V6 honda accord. There is something about a well balanced light weight sports car, where you sit low and look out over a long hood. Shifting an inline 6 at 6500, it’s just so darn fun. I was also reminded the 240Z is actually fairly quick. I got a chance to let it run once and hit >5,000 rpm in 4th gear pretty quick like. My Mazda3 would have petered out before those speeds were reached. 

functionoverfashion > zipfuel 06/23/2020 at 08:10

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A friend transported a 6' diameter Softub on the roof of his Geo Prizm a few hundred miles, it’s amazing he didn’t get stopped. It was “adequately” strapped down, but still. He said it was like driving a snail.